Dreamer

A realm of my own design.
Created in a state lucidity.
I only desire to remain asleep.
Nothing waits for me when I wake

Day in and day out. I struggle to breath.
I try to carry on but I can only concede.
This pain wont fade. It is here to stay.
And every moment awake is torture and plague.

I sleep to create, to give myself joy.
Even if only for just one night.
For those brief few hours,
I feel more alive than ever.

I am a dreamer, a creator of worlds.
This is my domain and what I say goes.
I am a dreamer, I will fabricate.
A place where I always feel so safe.

Every day is a struggle to live.
I greet each day with a hollow stare.
I feel I cannot go on. Not here. Not today.

So instead I close my eyes and press on in my dreams.
Life is pain but in our dreams, creation is in our hands.

I am a dreamer, a creator of worlds.
This is my domain and what I say goes.

I am a dreamer, Let my will be done.
My word is law, Let my voice be heard.

I am a dreamer, a creator of worlds.
This is my domain and what I say goes.
I am a dreamer, I will fabricate.
A place where I always feel so safe.

Creation is in our hands.

Creation is in our hands.

Inspiration:

Depression is one hell of an ailment. Anyone who fights this daily battle knows this. Sometimes it’s tough to even get out of bed. You stare at the walls for literally hours on end. You curl into a little ball of self loathing and wish you could compress your self further. Everyone has their way of fighting this battle. Some people medicate. Some people seek counseling. Some people resort to drugs or alcohol. For me, I took to my dreams. I taught my self the art of lucid dreaming; The art of controlling every aspect of your dreams. I would create scenarios in which an ex lover still loved and wanted me, make my self the hero in an epic fantasy adventure, have sex with people I’ve always wanted to, the list could go on, really. It’s my escape from reality. When ever my depression severely sets in, I typically do this. I sleep. A lot. And that is because the worlds I created in my dreams were leagues better than the world we live in. For me, the depression comes in waves. So when it eventually passes, I can go back to living life in the real world, but it’s always a useful asset to have for when it really hits me hard.

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